YoYo-

Back in the saddle!! 

**What up with the alien-like substance on Kenny Rogers hand?  Reader and longtime friend DeezNuts wants answers!  Oh, I’ve had 17 people ask me that.  I’ve asked many of my sources.  Answer:  No ******* clue.  Pine tar?  Dirt?  It was so overt that one almost can’t assume any tomfoolery.  We investigate anyway.  Send me your vibes.**

**Jim Leyland is the man**

**If this series goes 6 or 7(which it’s looking like), E Maj is working on going live Detroit-style**

**It’s kinda funny watching Dusty be part of a broadcast crew.  Playing the game.  I think he was a decent manager in the 90s, and now is just a shrill.  Just my humble opinion.**

**Buck O’Neill died.  Didn’t cover it.  Negro League pioneer and stud.  Will cover it.**

**On a related note, look forward to next year when A.C. and I expose the Tribune Company for……well, you’ll just have to wait…it’s been a fun year!**

**I love baseball**

**Is it me or are the best ‘teams’ advancing these days?  Marlins, then WhiteSox, then Detroit/Cards…for all the negativity surrounding baseball, the Renaissance is here, let’s embrace it.**

Peace, E Maj

Tigers advance past the Yanks!  Congrats Detroit fans!  Sitting past the witching hour watching woodworkers re-model the bookstore.  Will have plenty more tomorrow.  Peace out!

peace, E Maj

e-maj@spikesballparks.com   

**A’s take 2 in Minnesota.  Is it Oakland’s year?  The irony would be that Beane went away from his formula, or at least adjusted it.  To that, I say, as a big Moneyball critic, kudos Billy.**

**Playoff baseball is great**

**If you step outside the shower to take a pee, you are fired from reading anything I ever write**

**A great example of how America has been over-corporatized over the last decade is watching ESPN’s evolution.  The Armani suits/style contests by the vee-jays are over the top……In related news, I’m dusting off my 3-piece so I can go talk baseball with my buddies at the pub**

**Watching the Dodgers, reminiscing, I can’t get Kirk Gibson’s home run blast against Eck outta my head..Aahhh, sweet!**

**Pads lose to the Cards, and all I can think of is  Giles(?) mis-executing the bunt that led to a 1-6-3 double play**

**If it’s possible, I think the Yanks were not talked up this year…hmmm…Wang seems a good proxy for that theory**

**Mea culpa:  I’ve taken the last 2 of the last 3 Sundays off from baseball….Chicago Bears tailgates have been off-the-charts this year**

**Playoff baseball: just win baby!**

Peace, E Maj

e-maj@spikesballparks.com

Buck Showalter was fired today as manager of the Texas Rangers, which means a World Series title is imminent in Arlington. 

Fired by the New York Yankees in 1995, the Bronx Bombers proceeded to win 4 of the next 5 World Series titles.  Fired by Arizona in 2000, the D-Backs won their first ever World Series title the next year. 

Perhaps Buck prepares these teams to win, but is just grating enough to wear out his welcome as they hit the shaft part of their ‘hockey stick growth’.

Peace, E Maj

e-maj@spikesballparks.com

p.s. Dusty article posted at www.spikesballparks.com , I’ll run it here in a couple days…l8r

Content has slowed a bit over here admittedly, as I am heavily involved with the new bookstore mission, www.transitionsbookplace.com .  Playoffs are here however, and I’ll be posting as much as possible.  Still sticking with LADodgers to win it all, my pre-season pick.  It was supposed to be the year of Grady’s revenge but my Boston RedSox fell apart around the time their heart and soul, Jason Varitek went down with injury.  Both New York teams, the A’s, Tigers, and Cards were also E Maj faves.  Bit the bag on picking Cleveland to finish much higher.  Let’s say the Dodgers over the Yanks in 6. 

Peace, E Maj

p.s. even though we’re started, feel free to send playoff picks to me at e-maj@spikesballparks.com

Alright.  Alright.  I’m going into the lab to crank out an essay, it’s ripe to be picked outta my head.  Y’all know my picks.  Still going with Grady’s Revenge and my pre-season pick of LADodgers over Boston.  I want to hear who y’all think is going to bring home the prize.  Post a comment here, or email me at e-maj@spikesballparks.com

Peace, E Maj

**WORLD SERIES!!!!!….I’d say I’m more excited than a kid in a candy store, but that’s a Rogersism(Phil)….hmmm…let’s go there…

I’m more excited than:

–a mediocre hack golfer sinking a 20 foot birdie putt, for his only birdie of the year–

–the one time in 5 years you watch a movie that doesn’t have a predictable ending–

–finding twenty bucks in your jeans unexpectedly–

–the day I found a Mechanic who had the courtesy to give me the reach-around–

–a trust fund baby who just turned 18–

–when you ask the hottest chick in the room to dance and she says yes–

–Jay Mariotti when he plays a tape of himself back to himself–

–a 6th grader on the last day of school–

–a teenager getting their 1st driver’s license–

–finishing a crossword puzzle–

–eating a Taco Burrito and not having it ruin my internal plumbing the next 3 days–

…the only 2 things that were so much better were dating/marrying my wife, and the birth of my little girl, and everything she learns every single day…

The World Series is our sports holiday, I hope it’s a good one, and I hope we can enjoy it together….

Quick Seeds:

**What Phil Rogers DIDN’T point out in his column today(although it was a decent column, was the only reason I’m not picking the WhiteSox in 5 games….the Sox bullpen has pitched a total of 7 innings in 21 days..ONE reliever will pitch more than that in a normal 3 week sample…simulated games to prepare them? save it…oh yeah, that’s the same, because there’s an L-screen on the mound in the real games right?…the Sox ‘pen will blow at least one game…so I’ll go with the WhiteSox in 6 games….**

**If the World Series wasn’t in Chitown, I’d be here http://upcoming.org/event/34033/… (tks Toddo from www.minyanville.com **

**I have a rub without the tug(massage) scheduled in an hour, yet due to a dietary fast have the worst flatulent gas of my life……I’ll let you know how that works out**

**you probably saw it but I thought it was great when after Game 5 Brad Ausmus grabbed the airplane microphone while 30,000 feet above in the air, and razzed Brad Lidge, "If you look out to the left, you’ll see Albert Pujols’ home run ball still travelling"…nice..**

**BREAK-IN!!!!…I am quitting my day job to pursue and develop Heckler Nation and follow my baseball dreams.  This life change needed a 60% majority and just narrowly received it in a close 9-6 vote between my 15 personalities.  A deciding factor was that ‘Amoeba Mariotti’ T-shirts now can be a tax-write off**

**I have 3 great articles I’m putting the finishing touches on, keep checking in**

Bonus Yogiism– ‘Always go to other people’s funerals; otherwise they won’t go to yours."–Yogi Berra

Peace, E Maj….reach me at ericm1@nase.org

The Force Be With You.  What in the name of all that’s holy, or in my case, a kielbasa sandwich and a 12-pack of Miller High Life, happened in the WhiteSox 2-1 victory over the Angels last night in the ALCS?.  The Heckler has an idea.  We bore witness to the Long Lost Jedi Knight, and A.J. Pierzynski is his name.  The Jedi lineage did not stop at Luke Skywalker.  A little-known fact is that Yoda also took the Heckler under his wing, and taught him the Force.  The lineage was supposed to end there, but due to Yoda’s compulsive gambling on the Game of Tiddlywinks, it has long been rumored Yoda had to sell himself and the Force out, and learn it to one more pupil to absolve a gambling debt larger than J-Lo’s derriere.  That pupil as it turns out, was A.J.Pierzynski, WhiteSox catcher, whose father was the Babe Ruth of Tiddlywinks, as it turns out.

With the game tied 1-1, and 2 outs in the 9th inning, Angels relief pitcher Kelvim Escobar, was overpowering the flaccid Sox bats, striking out 5 K’s in 2 2/3 innings.  Escobar has some of the filthiest stuff in the league when he’s ‘on’, or not letting his mind wonder about which is more popular, long john tops or long john bottoms.    Though a starter for the past couple of years, Kelvim is very comfortable in relief, evidenced by the 38 saves he piled up in 2002 as Toronto’s closer.

Then, a situation occurred that was odder than if your brother was also your father.  With 2 strikes, A.J. swings through a low pitch, LA catcher Josh Paul seems to make a clean catch, and home plate umpire Doug Eddings rings him Pierzynski up for the 3rd out.  What people subsequently thought they saw, was Pierzynski take a couple steps towards his dugout, the Angels running in for the next inning, Josh Paul toss the baseball back to the mound, and the fat guy sitting in the 3rd row snarfing down his 11th hot dog.  The Force Be With You. 

What really happened was the previously anonymous Jedi, A.J. Pierzynski, used the Force on a discombombulated Eddings, and then turned around and took off for 1st base, as one is allowed to try to advance to first if any 3rd strike is not caught by the catcher.  One important detail—-Paul CAUGHT the ball!, and Eddings, who is now no longer on LA manager Mike Sciosia’s XMAS Card list, had already signalled the Jedi was out.  Also, one has to use the word dicombombulated any chance one gets, even if you are just referring to the fact that you just used the word discombombulated.

The Angels were simply stunned, as the Force is wont to do, and A.J. gains 1st base.  The Heckler, has actually used this tactic before in college, because when your bat is weaker than the Washington Generals chances of beating the Harlem Globetrotters, only 2 things work—the Force or Rowdy Roddy Piper(notorious WWF bad guy) tactics.  I digress.

The umpires, stunned by the Force, let the play stand.  Josh Paul, stunned by the Force, has no chance to throw out pinch runner Pablo Ozuna.  Escobar, stunned by the Force, throws a weak, hanging forkball, that Joe Crede hammers down the left-field line.  Sox win 2-1.  Wham! Bam! Thank You Ma’am!

The lingering questions baseball fans may have after this odd sequence of events, might be as follows.

Why did home plate umpire Doug Eddings pump his fist for the 3rd out, then renege?

Why did Josh Paul not tag Pierzynski anyway just to be safe?

What did Mike Scoscia eat in the off-season to gain 75 pounds, a belly that didn’t allow  him to get on the field in a timely manner to protest the call?

Why did the umpires after the game continue to act as if they made the right call?

It’s quite simple.  A.J. Pierzynski is the long-lost anonymous Jedi Knight who possesses the Force.  May the Force Be With You.

**John Smoltz showed why he’s one of the best post-season pitchers EVER(Win, 7IP 1 ER)  As a team player, he accepted the closer role for 3 years, and enjoyed it save(pun intended) for one thing.  In a short series in the playoffs, the Braves could get swept and Smoltz would have no chance to impact the outcome**

**Congrats to WhiteSox fans.  There are lots of reasons why Ozzie Guillen should be Manager of the Year.  It would not have been out of the question to let El Duque finish the game against the RedSox, as he was pitching lights out.  Ozzie has his eyes on the ultimate prize though, and knows he needs Bobby Jenks to go all the way.  He gave the kid closer the ball, and said ‘You’re my guy, win or lose’.  Ozzie rocks.**

**Isn’t it telling that last yr’s post-season savior, Curt Schilling, did not even appear in the ALDS?**

**&^$*$#@!$%@#!!.  I just found out 5 minutes ago that I do NOT have Columbus Day off from work.  I guess that means only 12 High Lifes instead of a case today.**

**Hard to write off the Braves with Hudson/Smoltz still having a say in the matter**

**According to ESPN’s Sunday Roundup, the Yankees have a Big Unit and a Wang available in the ‘pen today**

**The easy and obvious factor to point to for St.Louis’ added dominance is the Mulder(trade)/Carpenter(inj.) pickups.  Can’t help but wonder though about the impact of the grittiness of perpetual overachievers Eckstein and Grudzielanek.  Maybe that is the shortcoming of recent versions of the star-powered Yankees.  Not enough ****-and-vinegar guys such as Scott Brosius, Paul O’Neill, Tino, Girardi, etc.**

Alright, so the title needs more work than Steve Sax or Chuck Knoblauch’s throwing arm.  Sue me.  Actually don’t.  Meet me at the corner of Nelson and Racine so you can partake in the aura of what a BAD burrito does to someone when coupled w/7 High Lifes.  What was I talking about?….Oh yeah, quick take on the pair of Sox.

1)Continuing the internal plumbing theme(how’d I get here), I completely underestimated the WhiteSox’ cathartic release after not choking the division away.  Amazing, every WhiteSox fan I know needed some of my baby daughter’s Pampers, as Cleveland won 17 of 19 until 9/25.  Tribe OF Grady Sizemore muffs a fly ball and the Injuns lose 6 of their last 7.  Chicago is playing loose to say the least.

2)Let us never forget, us being me and the other person in this padded room, that what matters most in the Playoffs is Pitching, Pitching, and Pitching.  A quote from Jesus Damon today, "I don’t even know who our #1 starter is!?"….Nice.  Actually, Johnny, the #1 SP is still Curt Schilling, but point taken that he’s to be confused with a batting practice machine these days.  We’ll conveniently overlook the fact that you 2 get along as well as, say, George Brett and the ‘Pine-Tar’ ump.  Also, that I’m convinced you grip the baseball w/3 fingers instead of 2, because it’s impossible for a Major League OF arm to be that weak.

**What the F***, this was supposed to be a short article….Did I take my meds today?***

3)I told my Whitesox buddy they need to finish off the series in Game 3,  the ‘let sleeping dogs lie’ theory, if you will.  If Boston can pull Game 3 off, I said I’m going ‘heavy, heavy, w/fries’ on the RedSox to win Game 4.  Then, against the hottest pitcher in the league, Contreras, all bets would be off.  But back to Game 3….

The last thing a hot-hitting team wants to do is face a knuckleballer.  When one is ‘locked in’ at the plate, in a good rhythym, not only can a guy like Wakefield throw an offense off that game, but disrupt the next few as well.  We saw evidence of that earlier this year during Boston’s historic visit to the North Side of Chicago to play the Cubbies.  The Cubs were hitting frozen ropes for 2 straight days, as good as they’ve looked all year.  Wakefield completely baffles them in the 3rd game of the series, and the Cubs proceed to lose 9 of 12.  All of this may be slightly diluted by the WhiteSox’ punch and Judy, small-ball style of play.  We’ll see.

Today is the ‘make or break’ game, IMHO.  If the RedSox can get one pitcher performance(out of Wake, in this case), the Ortiz/Manny duo will grab Game 4.  Contreras’ brilliance will be offset equally by the divergent amount of each respective team’s amount of "BIG GAME" experience.  All speculation, but that would make for an epic Game 5.

Peace, E Maj