Tagged: HUH?

Blurb Central

from USA today—-

Florida Marlins 1b won’t be observing Passover.  Contrary to what many fans have thought since he came up through the Mets system, Jacobs said he is not Jewish.  That didn’t stop the Marlins from planning a Mike Jacobs youth T-shirt give-away May 28—–"Jewish Heritage Day" on the team’s promotional calendar.

BBHeckler—evidently Florida’s off-season fire sale including most of their marketing department

Peace, E Maj

BBHeckler@yahoo.com

Pablum Central

Some ‘wisdom’ from Cubs beat writer Mike Kiley of the Chicago Sun-Times..

‘Probably the dumbest cliche in baseball is that it’s all about pitching and defense. After all, the most runs always wins.’  (tks Josh)

Thanks for the value added, Mike.  Brilliant.  Geesh.  How exactly do these people get these jobs anyway?

Peace, E Maj

bbheckler@yahoo.com

Pass Go and Grab Your $5.7 million Signing  Bonus

Chicago WhiteSox traded OF Joe Borchard to Seattle for lhp Matt Thornton.  Both 1st round draft pick ‘busts’.  The WhiteSox got a wild, confident 6’6" lefthander who throws 97 mph that pitching coach Don Cooper couldn’t wait to get his hands on.  Seattle got a physical specimen who has no idea how to play the game(think Billy Beane as a player).

For this week’s "HUH" post, Mr. Borchard, who has hit under the Mendoza Line in his limited Major League appearances(298 AB), had this to say to his new manager Mike Hargrove(the Human Rain Delay)…..

"I’m most comfortable in Right Field."….Ummm….does he know Mr. Ichiro plays in Seattle?….nuff said!….

Peace, E Maj

bbheckler@yahoo.com

HUH?

(as part of our self-appointed role of Universal Adverb Policeman, we will be showcasing our new Category, ‘HUH?’, which simply points out humorous items, quotes, and non-sensical banter by athletes and writers–Ed.)

Note: this one is from the Basketball World, but it is the essence of ‘HUH?’.–BBHeckler

Ron Artest, notorious NBA bad boy, was recently traded to Sacramento from Indiana.  Recently, his team played the Chicago Bulls, his one-time team who originally drafted Ron.  "I still run Chicago.  I was the closest thing to Michael Jordan."  Ron then paused before finishing.  "But we lost every game."…HUH?

Ron’s delusions have delusions.

Peace, E Maj

BBheckler@yahoo.com

Let the Dustyisms Begin

NO NEW TRICKS: As much as critics want to point to the Cubs’ poor fundamentals last season, manager Dusty Baker said there isn’t anything new that can be done in this regard.

"We’ll re-stress it with sowme of the older guys who should know better,” Baker said. "You can’t do much different. [Fundamentals] are what they are

(from Chicago Sun-Times)….No better person to open our new category "HUH?", than w/the Reverend Dusty himself.  ARE YOU KIDDING ME?.  Let me get this straight: The Cubs, by my count, lost about 10 games due to poor fundies/game mismanagement last year.  Highlights included 2 botched pickles between 3rd base and home plate, one of which resulting in the game-winning run.  An unthinkable 3!!!! times in one game a pitcher did not cover 1st base on a grounder to the right side.

AND DUSTY SAYS THERE’S NOTHING THAT CAN BE DONE ABOUT THIS!!!.  WHAT THE F***?.  Can someone please stick a morphine drip directly into my left eyeball?  Geez.  The sad part is there are a number of scenarios the Cubs could win 88-90 games this year, and people won’t realize that it was a 100 win team that did that—-DITCH DUSTY!

Peace, E Maj

BBheckler@yahoo.com